The Fear of Conflict  

One of the biggest reasons I find that managers find it hard to have difficult conversations is because they fear conflict. It’s natural to feel anxious or uneasy when you’re about to engage in a disagreement with someone. Managers worry that their employee will become defensive or hostile, which can lead to an unproductive conversation. Unfortunately, this fear can cause a manager to avoid having the conversation altogether—which only serves to make the problem worse. The crucial point here is to know your employee well, and to have a solid and good relationship with them.  

The Lack of Training  

Another issue is that many managers lack the training necessary for having effective difficult conversations. For example, many managers haven’t been taught how to effectively manage emotions or how to handle challenging behaviours in a productive way. Without proper training, these kinds of conversations often end up being confrontational and unhelpful. Knowing how to recognise where they are in the conversation and how to delve or go back up a level in the conversation is a skill really needing to be mastered.  

The Need for Empathy  

Finally, there’s the need for empathy. Many managers are afraid that if they show empathy towards their employee during a difficult conversation, then they won’t be taken seriously or respected as a leader. However, showing empathy is key when having these kinds of conversations—it helps build trust between the manager and the employee and encourages an open dialogue.  A successful difficult conversation requires both sides to feel heard and understood; by showing empathy towards your employee, you can help ensure this happens.  

In summary….  

Difficult conversations are inevitable in any managerial role—the key is finding ways to make them less daunting and more productive for everyone involved. By facing your fear of conflict head-on and seeking out training on how best to manage emotions during tough conversations, you’ll be better prepared for whatever comes your way as a manager. Additionally, don’t forget that empathy is essential in any kind of conversation; by showing empathy towards your employees during these tough talks, you can help create an atmosphere where everyone feels heard and understood. With these tips in mind, you’ll be well equipped succeed at even the most challenging difficulties conversations! 

If you would like support or assistance to have a mediated conversation, do get in contact with us here at Bower HR. 

Serena Bower (MCIPD) 

Director, Bower HR Limited 

The post Difficult Conversations: The Manager’s Dilemma appeared first on Bower HR.

Prepare in Advance. 

One of the best ways to prepare for a difficult conversation is to plan ahead. Take some time before the conversation to think through what you want to say, how you want to say it, and what outcome you want from the conversation. Think about how the conversation might progress. Doing this will help you maintain control over the conversation and ensure that it progresses in the way that you intended. It will also help you stay focused on your main points instead of getting sidetracked by emotion or tangents.  

Stay Calm & Collected 

It’s easy to get emotional when discussing something that could potentially be uncomfortable or contentious. However, staying calm is key when navigating any kind of conflict resolution situation. Try your best to remain composed throughout the conversation so that you can keep things on track and ensure that everyone involved is able to express their thoughts without fear of repercussion or judgment. This will create an environment where both parties feel heard and respected which is essential for successful conflict resolution. What are your calming techniques? I recommend speaking slowly, emphasise the words with your mouth to slow matters so it provides time to think… and of course breathe! 

Be Clear and Direct  

When having a difficult conversation as a manager, it’s important to ensure that everyone involved understands exactly what is being discussed and why it matters. Be direct with your language so that there isn’t any confusion about what needs to be done or how the situation should be handled going forward. Make sure your message is clear and concise so that everyone understands their role in resolving any issues at hand.  

 
In Summary… 

Having difficult conversations as a manager can be stressful but with proper preparation and an understanding of appropriate communication techniques, they don’t have to be overwhelming experiences. By preparing in advance, staying calm and collected during the discussion, and being clear with your language, you can ensure successful conflict resolution while maintaining respect between all parties involved. With these tips in mind, managing difficult conversations will become second nature! 

If you would like support or assistance to have a mediated conversation, do get in contact with us here at Bower HR. 

Serena Bower (MCIPD) 

Director, Bower HR Limited 

The post Navigating Difficult Conversations as a Manager appeared first on Bower HR.

Why Stay Interviews Matter  

Stay interviews are important because they allow employers to gain valuable insights into what their employees are thinking, and this information can be used to make changes that will help reduce turnover and increase job satisfaction. This can lead to higher levels of productivity and morale among employees. Additionally, it’s a great way to show your employees that you care about their professional development and growth.  However, this should not be just a one off interview, these discussions should naturally be occurring in the workplace as monthly 1-2-1s. 

What Happens During a Stay Interview?  

During a stay interview, the employer should take time to ask the employee questions about their job satisfaction, such as what they like most about working for the company and what could be improved. The employer should also find out what kind of support the employee needs in order to continue feeling satisfied with their work environment. Finally, it’s important for employers to ask for feedback on how they can better motivate their team members or make other improvements.  The discussion is a two way process and should be conducted with empathy and understanding.  Equally that the environment is a safe one to share thoughts openly without repercussion. 

The Benefits of Stay Interviews  

Stay interviews offer multiple benefits for both employers and employees alike. For employers, they provide valuable insight into how satisfied employees are with their jobs, which in turn allows them to take actionable steps towards increasing job satisfaction levels among all staff members. Additionally, staying in touch with your team through regular stay interviews can help build trust between you and your employees—creating a more positive work environment overall! For employees, stay interviews offer an opportunity for open communication with senior leaders about their job satisfaction levels—and provides them with an avenue for voicing any concerns or suggestions they might have. All in all, these conversations foster stronger relationships between employers and employees—which is beneficial for everyone involved!   

To conclude… 

Stay interviews enable employers to learn more about what makes their staff happy at work while providing an opportunity for open dialogue between employer-employee relations. They offer invaluable insights into job satisfaction levels among staff members while providing an avenue through which employers can make meaningful changes that will benefit all parties involved. Ultimately, investing time in conducting stay interviews will go a long way towards creating a positive work environment where both staff members feel supported and appreciated—so don’t wait any longer; start scheduling your first stay interview today! 

If you are unsure how to conduct such a discussion, get in touch with us here at Bower HR and we can support you in having good, but at times difficult conversations. 

Serena Bower (MCIPD) 

Director, Bower HR Limited 

The post What Is a Stay Interview and How Can It Benefit Your Business? appeared first on Bower HR.

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Most grievances contain at least an element of truth. The ‘wrong’ may be very small, it may be blown up out of all proportion, but an individual will generally base a grievance around something that happened that they genuinely weren’t happy with.

Prevention

The most important advice which can be given to a Manager or Supervisor, is to identify the issue early and address it before the matter escalates and results in a breakdown of the employment relationship.

Having the difficult conversation can be a good conversation.

When early pointers suggest a potential issue, look at the matter from the employees perspective, is it a true reflection of the situation.
Discuss the matter informally, what could realistically be achieved to assist in addressing the matter? Is the matter exaggerated, or indeed a vexatious matter? Remember an employee’s perception is their reality. If the informal discussions heed no progress the individual has the option to register their grievance in a formal written way to highlight clearly what they are aggrieved about without prejudice or discrimination.

If a Grievance is received, a formal response is required acknowledging the receipt of the grievance within a reasonable timescale which should be outlined in the Grievance procedure.

Following a Grievance Process

There are four core steps for an employer to follow in addressing a formal grievance raised

1. Investigation
   As soon as possible after receiving notification of a grievance, the employer should carry out an investigation. In many cases, this will be a relatively straightforward fact-finding exercise. If the grievance involves other members of staff, they should be informed and given an opportunity to provide their own evidence.
   The investigation process will depend on the specific circumstances of the case.Ultimately, the aim of the investigation is to establish the full facts of the grievance before any decision is taken.
2. Grievance meeting
   After the investigation, the employer should hold a meeting with the employee so that he or she has an opportunity to explain the complaint.
   The employee should be asked how he or she thinks the grievance should be resolved and what outcome he or she is seeking.
   The Acas code of practice on disciplinary and grievance procedures states that an employee should be given a statutory right to be accompanied by a companion at a grievance meeting.
   Tribunals take the code into account when considering relevant cases, and can increase awards of compensation by up to 25% for an unreasonable failure to comply with it.
3. Decision
   Having considered the evidence, the employer will need to decide whether to uphold or reject the grievance.
   The decision should be communicated to the employee, in writing, as soon as possible.
   If the grievance is upheld or partially upheld, the employer should tell the employee what action it proposes to take and how this will be implemented.
   The letter should also provide the employee with a right of appeal
4. Appeal
   If the grievance has been rejected or partially rejected, the employer should be prepared for an appeal.
   This should be dealt with by an impartial manager and, where possible, a more senior manager than the person who dealt with the grievance.
   Most appeal hearings will be in the form of a review but can take the form of a rehearing if the initial stage was procedurally flawed.
   After the hearing, the employee should be informed in writing of the outcome of the appeal. Ensure that notes are taken throughout the process so that anything discussed can be recalled with clarity and accuracy.
   Please do call us at Bower HR Consultancy to:
   • ensure you have a robust Grievance procedure in place in line with ACAS guidelines
   • deliver “good conversation / having a difficult conversation” training to Managers and Supervisors
   • Support through a Grievance process, and be an impartial party in hearing an appeal.

The post Managing Grievances appeared first on Bower HR.

Over the years I have seen managers shy away from these types of conversations, however not having the conversations at all will result in making matters worse and the issue deteriorating impacting the individual and the company’s productivity as the negativity fallout filters through other employees. Therefore, it is essential that someone else has the conversation on their behalf if they feel that they can’t. 

I am frequently asked to either have the conversation or sit in the conversation to support and mediate. I am asked to do this as the Manager has concerns which may be as a result for example due to time pressures, friendship, lack of confidence, the need to maintain fairness and transparency. Managers are also afraid of ‘getting it wrong’ which could lead to greater problems.

However, here I would like to offer some tips to enable you to hold these conversations with more confidence and to get the right result.

1. Remove the emotion from the situation: Talking to someone when you yourself are angry, upset, frustrated, fed up with them, or with any other emotion running high is always going to lead to trouble. Wait until you are calm and can approach the challenge with a clear head so that you can be fully in control. You can show empathy in a situation, however, not to become emotionally involved. In the example of disciplinary situation where you feel you have been offended or betrayed, it is unlikely you can undertake the investigation and disciplinary hearing proceedings with clear judgement and without prejudice – this is where someone else should assist and take forward the meeting.

2. Decide on the best approach: One size does not fit all, even where there is a policy or procedure you are following. People will react differently depending on their circumstances. Someone who might usually be a strong and dominant individual in normal circumstances might react very differently when, for example, talking about their health or other personal issues. Similarly, a very timid and shy person might become infuriated and defensive if they are accused of something or if their performance is criticised.

3. Carefully prepare: Whether you are going to have a conversation in person or on the ‘phone, or even simply communication by letter or email, you need to carefully prepare what you are going to say. 
If it is a letter or email, think about the strength of words and language that is being used and the tone of the communication, even where it has been prepared by HR or a solicitor. Equally take time to prepare the letter or email – how often have you heard that when you are angry do not right an email in response as it is likely to be unbalanced in its nature.

Ask yourself, is it too confrontational? Does it imply that you suspect the employee of not being honest when the matter has yet to be investigated? Is it abrupt or not particularly informative? Even dismissal letters can be written with compassion and empathy. If you can, put yourself in the shoes of the person receiving the letter and write it with total regard for their self-respect and well-being.

Meetings are much more difficult to prepare for, however they must remain factual and focused on the purpose and outcome. First look at the current situation – who they are, there general approach and personality in the work-place, are you aware of any specific stresses or anxieties that they are facing. All of these factors can contribute to how you should handle the conversation and how the conversation will be received.

4. Be clear about the outcome you want to achieve: Think of the outcome you want to achieve. Is that outcome realistic given the individual and the information you have at hand? Understanding the position to be discussed from the individual’s perspective and what they may or may not buy into. Can the outcome be achieved in an informal way?

5. Deliver your message calmly and with your goal in mind: Firstly, ensure that your goal is realistic, and where necessary deliver the message cautiously. If it is a meeting due to poor performance which could lead towards dismissal proceedings, the conversation requires to be focused on the concerns of performance providing evidence to support this. When listening to the response, ensure that you can recognise that reasonable support has been provided to the individual. This will lead to a correct judgement of next steps of action.

6. Review: In more complex situations you will need to carefully review the position before taking any final decisions. It may be that further steps are necessary before you can achieve your goal or that a different route is followed or even that you should focus on another goal.

I always ensure that those I support always take stock when reviewing a disciplinary cases, a potential redundancy dismissal and before any grievance outcome is confirmed. It is a chance to consider all the options. That you are making judgement without any pre-conceived views or ideas.

The pause is a vital ‘breathing space’ to enable you to think carefully about the next step – and do so without emotion and any knee jerk reaction. It is also a chance to consider other possible options, such as mediation, giving a lesser warning, provide the employee a further opportunity to sort them self out, looking at settlement agreements or talking to ACAS.

You need to able to clearly explain your decision, based on the facts and the evidence available to you – all extracted from the difficult conversation. This is the remaining test as to whether or not your decision or action would be considered ‘reasonable’ or not, in the eyes of someone else – usually an Employment Judge.

In Summary

How we tackle difficult discussions, or indeed not having them at all has a major impact on the outcomes we see in our business – have we resolved the conflict and created a stage for everyone to move forward together, or have we escalated the conflict to the point where it has become unbearable and everything deteriorates, from mental and physical health to team productivity and success/profits? 

Have we created a winning situation for both the company and the employee, or a ‘win/lose’ situation for either party? Every single issue, however difficult it may appear to be, is resolvable by having good, honest, but difficult conversations, which puts your business at minimum risk of escalating disputes and/or increasing the risk of employment tribunal awards.

Equally avoiding conversations altogether can only gradually lead to a culture of apathy, disregard and deterioration in productivity as the negativity and lack of respect for Managers seeps its way through the roots of the company. 

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